Embracing Self-Compassion During Uncertainty

When we hit a setback—job loss, uncertainty, or major life changes—it’s easy to fall into self-criticism. We think that pushing ourselves harder or toughening up will get us through. But research tells a different story: the “drill sergeant” voice inside actually increases stress, impairs problem-solving, and makes it harder to move forward.

I’ve seen it in my work as an I/O Psychologist, and I’ve felt it personally. Since being impacted by the HHS Reduction in Force, I’ve caught myself in those moments of pressure and self-doubt. But what’s been helping me reset and move forward is something simple and powerful: self-compassion.

Self-compassion isn’t about giving up or letting ourselves off the hook. It’s about creating the emotional conditions that make growth possible. When we treat ourselves with kindness, we activate the body’s calming systems, reduce cortisol, and shift from fight-or-flight into a state where learning, resilience, and action become possible.

One practice I’ve been using daily is Dr. Kristin Neff’s Self-Compassion Break:

Pause & reflect – I place a hand on my heart and simply notice what I’m feeling.
Name the struggle – “This is hard.” Acknowledging it brings relief.

Normalize it – “Others feel this way too.” It connects me to shared humanity.
Offer kindness – I say, “May I be kind to myself,” and let that message sink in.

It takes less than a minute, but this small practice helps me feel more grounded, clear-headed, and ready to take the next step.

If you’re navigating uncertainty right now, I’d love to hear what’s helping you—or simply connect and support one another. These are the moments when connection and compassion matter most.